Hello, I’m a mentalist who dreams of economic freedom. Today, I would like to write a short but warm story called “Consideration in the Name of Play – The Old Couple’s Special Play” that makes me think twice about caring for the other person.

< Consideration in the Name of Play – The Old Couple’s Special Play >

There was a unique play by an old couple, and when the grandmother says “eyes” the grandfather puts his finger around his eyes with a slightly clumsy gesture.

Also, when grandmother says “ear, Grandpa grabs his ear and when he says “belly button,” he lifts his outer jacket and reveals his belly button to his grandmother.

When they played this game, they looked so happy that they could laugh. There’s a story about an old couple with gray hair who started playing this game like children.

– Grandmother who missed her grandson

My grandmother missed her grandson who lived far away and missed the memory of playing with him with his eyes, nose, and mouth.

That’s why the grandfather, who knew her grandmother’s feelings well, imitated her grandchild’s gesture as she called.

-Excerpts from “A Warm Day”-

– Consideration is relative

It is only natural to like and love someone and to be considerate of them. However, since each person has a different tendency and standard of consideration, I often see cases where I am consideration but not consideration of the other person or even offend them.

If love is a one-way street, it is a one-sided love, and just as the result is usually not good, consideration often leaves only scars.

This consideration is usually formed through education with parents, siblings, and school friends when they are young, and as they grow up, they learn more and how to understand and care for others through books or various direct and indirect experiences.

– No more selfish consideration!

If you look around you, you are trapped in obstinacy and stubbornness, including me, and often feel sad because you don’t care about the other person at all, and if the other person shows disappointment and hates it, why don’t you understand my heart?

Of course, if you are someone who only cares about the other person’s heart and is grateful, the situation may go well until some point, but it is more problematic if you met someone like that.

This is because it is easy to fall into the swamp of the illusion that you are a very caring person due to self-satisfaction disease.

The longer and worse the selfish consideration becomes, the further away the path that reaches the other person’s heart.

If you think about the other person and have a heart for them,

Rather than thinking, “I’m sure you’ll like it if I do this.” or “You’ll like it if I give you this.”

Think of it like that, “You didn’t like doing this.” or “You didn’t like it if I gave you this.”

If I think like this, I have a chance to escape from selfish consideration, which is my own self-satisfaction.

– What about real consideration?

And then you have this idea. What should I do with real consideration? It depends on the opponent, but there is something in common no matter who you meet.

Consideration means that the subject should be the other person because it starts with a good heart that the other person becomes happy because of me, and the pain that he or she has is not sick and disappears.

Surprise is good. But was it really the surprise that the other person wanted? It should be a priority to figure out whether the other person wanted it or not, and practice listening to the words from the other person’s mouth a little more.

The other person directly or indirectly tells you, and you ignore the signal even if you miss it or see it because of the selfish imagination of “If I do this, you will like it.”

If you have trouble talking to your lover, friends, or family, or if you are considerate and the other person does not like it and is not happy, try re-recalling the message or text you are recording.

And make sure to check or ask yourself what the other person really wanted, what they hated, if I missed anything. Obviously, the hint is always in the past.

– A one-line summary –

The real consideration is not to do what I want to do, but to listen to what the other person says and not do what the other person hates.

The man I met at the park – Mental management third post | Top_Mental (top-mental.com)

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